In a new press release, the Arabic Media Internet Network reports the findings of a Swedish researcher that of the gross human rights violations in the Palestinian-Israeli conflict, Israel is responsible for 97.8% of them. In other news, McDonald's announced that of the heart attacks suffered in America, Whole Foods Market is responsible for the exact same number.
"This entity is the root of all health problems in the world.
We must wipe them off the face of the earth!"
-Mahmoud Ahmadinejad's personal trainer
6 comments:
That photo of Whole Foods Market is around the corner from my son's apt. in NY....
Did you think anti-semitism stopped at Ben Gurion airport?
Israel is responsible for everything, including global warming brought on by the masses of hot air regularly expelled from the Knesset.
You've got to give them props for trying so hard... I mean, 97.8% - they could have just rounded it up to 98.
And in another surprising study, a completely objective and independent Palestinian news agency reported that 97% of suicide bombings in Israel over the last 10 years have actually been the fault of Israeli citizens. The same study concluded that the Jews were also being held responsible for Anna Nicole Smith's death, and Michael Jackson's transformation into a white man.
David,
Don't you mean white woman? He has the perfectly coiffed hair of a middle-aged woman with the porcelain complexion!
Ahhhh Whole Foods!
(Sorry- spot the recently converted yankophile. I'd have been even more excited if it was Trader Joe's)
One time I was sitting in my E. Jerusalem office and a woman told me that "The Israelis" were responsible for introducing dope into Palestinian yoof culture...
I miss Whole Foods so much.
And.
THAT WAS A VERY FUNNY JOKE.
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