Springtime in the War Zone...Calm in America

As the sun sets and the Sabbath queen prepares to arrive, I thank the Lord above for my safety in this war zone that is Israel. Just last week, I ran into my friend and former co-worker Lymore in Nachalat Binyamin, an artist market in Central Tel Aviv. Do not be fooled by the throngs of tank-topped pedestrians in the background, out and about enjoying the 70-degree weather. YOU KNOW THE TRUTH, MY LOYAL READERS!!! CNN NEVER LIES!!!

Soon after running into her, we jumped into the nearest bomb shelter and put on 487 gas masks between us.

Lymore and Benji, immediately before we jumped
on our camels and galloped off to safety.

(Meanwhile, back in safe America, a teacher puts clothespins on kindergarteners' mouths and someone opens fire at an Atlanta mall.)

Shabbat shalom, everybody!