Now? Well...this.
Souljah Boys aside, Israel has everything now. McDonalds. Check. MTV? Check. Canned Spam? Ok...we don't have that, baruch hashem. (That's just nasty, Americans.)
You keep this out of our country, we'll keep arsim out of yours.Reality TV? Just as big here. And the biggest shows from the West all have their own Middle Eastern versions. "American Idol"? "Kochav Nolad". "Dancing with the Stars"? "Rokdim im Kochavim".
You know what I want to see? "Fear Factor." Oh yeah. Israeli Fear Factor. This show would be so easy to write! All the challenges? They're already here!
Round one? Drive.
Not with spiders, people. In a car, with Israel drivers. I wouldn't do it. All the cars here with their red "שמור מרחק" (shmor mirchak) bumper stickers...does anyone know what that means? You wanna know? I'll tell you. "Shmor mirchak" actually means "I drive like a loony bin." In case you were wondering.
Round two on Israeli Fear Factor? Twelve o'clock...on a Sunday...stand in line at Bituach Leumi. BEFORE A STRIKE. (Sorry, non-Israelis, it loses something in translation. I'll leave it to my fellow olim...what does "bituach leumi" mean to you?)
If any contestants manage to survive those two feats, the championship will surely knock them out. Ready? Go to the shuk, lick the ground.
Americans, you think live roach-eating is gross? I will pay a shiny, new two-shekel piece to anyone who can correctly identify the mystery gunk on the ground of Shuk HaCarmel. It's only a matter of time. I can't wait to see what other shows come here. "The Simple Life"? That's easy. Moshav.
What's on TV tonight?
7 comments:
Clearly, you were never in the IDF, otherwise you would know all about Luf לוף, which is Israeli MRE kosher spam and even more vile than the piggy stuff, if that is possible.
http://f.nau.co.il/upload/Xternal/IsraBlog/91/79/05/57991/misc/11894850.jpg
Second on the Loof comment....it is nasty, nasty stuff.
And we already have a version of the Simple Life. Celebrities are places in "fish out of water" scenarios. Yael Bar Zohar lived with a tribe in Africa, Aviv Gefen lived with a family in the Shtachim, a bunch of hot models worked on a farm on the Golan....
u had me laughing.. seriously ;)
I haven't watched much of Survivor Israel, but you do have to wonder why they sent them to the Caribbean. Like Israelis haven't managed to survive in every single other place in their many travels around the world. What's so tough about the Caribbean?
But I have to say--though it could be a tad over-sentimental--I love the fact that on Israeli Survivor, they are so Jewish. When on any other Survivor did you see the Tribes getting together on Friday night to say kiddush? Which previous Survivor brought along his tefillin?
A show that wouldn't work in Israel is The Great Race. Israelis who haven't travelled and couldn't find their way out of a paper bag? Yeah, unheard of.
I just thought I'd let you know that I'm blog-stalking you back, though I was amused by your posts.
I love Hisardut. Sure, Israelis can survive wars,and suicide bombing. But not showering for a month, cat fights and eating snakes. That's a whole different story!
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